


Hey Bond!

by Deansy, HumsHappily, phipiohsum475



Series: American English [2]
Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015), Supernatural
Genre: Asexual Castiel, BAMF Dean, BAMF Eggsy, Bisexual Dean, Bisexual Eggsy, Blood, Case Fic, Crossover, Deansy, Flirting, Harry Hart is Dead, Internalized Homophobia, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, M/M, Monster of the Week, Supernatural - Freeform, Supernatural Season 5 AU, Violence, kingsman - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-25
Updated: 2015-08-29
Packaged: 2018-04-17 04:08:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4651698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deansy/pseuds/Deansy, https://archiveofourown.org/users/HumsHappily/pseuds/HumsHappily, https://archiveofourown.org/users/phipiohsum475/pseuds/phipiohsum475
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“We’re dead, buddy. And it’s gonna stay that way. Get in the house, Bond.” Dean hadn’t put down his gun, but he was concerned. How the fuck did this guy know their names? They didn’t have prints on file; how could he have possibly known who they were?</p><p>“No, don’t think I will,” Eggsy said, smoothly pulling a gun from his waistband and training it on Sam. The other  was pointed at Dean with a grin. “Now, either we work together, or we don’t work at all. An’ I’d ‘preciate it if you stopped pointing that thing at me.” </p><p> </p><p>  <b>A Supernatural/Kingsman Crossover. You don't need to be familiar with both to enjoy (though we highly recommend both!).</b></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Best of Both Worlds

**Author's Note:**

> This fic takes place after Kingsman, and after S5E4 of of Supernatural. 
> 
> For comparison, Lucifer rising corresponds exactly with the world going fight crazy.
> 
> Currently, we are working on the 4th fic of the series, so we can guarantee that much.

“So get this-” Sam came back to the table, plate loaded high with salad.

Dean stabbed at a thick chunk of cheap steak, “Swear to god, Sammy, you say that way too much. Could be your damned catch phrase.”

“So, like you saying ‘son of a bitch’,” Sam affected Dean’s customary growl, then rose his eyebrows in challenge.

“Yeah, well, whatever,” Dean shrugged him off, annoyed at having been called out. “You got news?” he asked, pointing his fork in Sam’s direction. A piece of steak dropped off his fork, landing on Sam’s plate with a plop.

Sam frowned, and Dean laughed. “Just a little protein to go with all that rabbit shit, you’ll be fine. We got a hunt or what?”

Sam flicked the offending piece of food off his plate with his knife, “Yeah. Looks like vamps in Michigan.”

“Hell, this time a year? Can’t they be somewhere that isn’t half buried under a foot of snow and ice?”

“Don’t know what to tell you, Dean, but Bobby says we’re the closest. He says it looks like a whole nest, maybe a dozen or so hunting folks up and down the state.”

“Fan- _frickin'-_ tastic,” Dean stabbed another chunk of steak, chewing it while he talked, “So, you wanna head out tonight?”

-o-

Eggsy glanced around, suitcase wheels clicking on the pavement behind him as he made his way up the block towards the hotel. "Michigan, Merlin? Really?"

"I don' go around choosing where the baddies end up, lad. Ye can stop tha' train of thought, now."

"Why's this our thing? What have they even got here?"

"Cars, Galahad. Called the “Motor City” for a reason. Now, ken ye do your job and shut up?"

"Has a few perks," Eggsy muttered, going up to the front to sign in and grab his key. He unlocked his room and opened the door. "Nice, Merlin," he said, checking out the new suit on the bed. "You're the gov'ner."

"Aye," Merlin replied. "Thought you might enjoy that. Read your file, Eggsy. Yer after a musician. Someone's been killing off people left and right. We're afraid this one might be next. Figure out who's killing them, and protect her."

"Why's she so important?" Eggsy muttered, picking up the suit and hanging it on the door.

"Read yer file," Merlin replied reprovingly.

"All right, Merlin, keep your trousers on," Eggsy said. "I'll do it now. Well, in a minute"

He took his glasses off and set them up on the bed, ignoring Merlin's squawk of protest as he changed into his new suit, smirking at the cuff link daggers.

-o-

Eggsy knocked on the door of one of the first victim’s families, a somber look on his face.

A man with short cropped hair and a cheap black, off the rack suit answered the door. “Can I help you?”

"Yes, I'm here to speak to Mr. And Mrs. Robinson. Inspector Unwin from Scotland Yard."

The man just laughed, “Sorry buddy,” as he flipped over his own badge, revealing the letters FBI. “But I know you don’t got jurisdiction here.” The last thing Dean needed was for some fancy-ass inspector fumbling into a nest of vamps.

"I'm afraid I do, actually," Eggsy said, pulling the papers out from his jacket. "Tracking a serial killer." He could hear Merlin tapping furiously in his ear and smiled. "I'm sure we can work together."

 _Fuck_ , Dean thought, rubbing his face. “I’m sure you got all sorts of paperwork there, Henry Higgins. Lemme tell you what,” he reached into his wallet, pulling out a business card. “You sort this out with my Assistant Director, Mike Kaiser. When he gives me the call, telling me you’re legit, then we can talk.” He handed the card to the English gent.

Dean gave him a quick once over, appreciating the fit of the man’s suit, then shut the door in his face.

“Merlin,” Eggsy said, tongue darting out to wet his lips grumpily. “I hate bloody Americans.”

“Yer English talking to a Scot, you really wanna talk to me about hating people fer reasons of history?” Merlin said distractedly. “We’ve got a problem. That number doesna connect to the FBI. That’s a number in Kansas. A residence of Robert Singer.”

“What the fuck is going on here?” Eggsy muttered, stepping off the porch. “Dial anyway, we’ll figure out who they are, then I’ll crack their heads together.”

-o-

Dean frowned as he walked back into the vic’s living room. Of all the law enforcement they’d had to lied to, Scotland Yard was a new one. “Agent Stiles,” he spoke, addressing Sam, “Can I speak to you for a moment?”

Sam looked up and saw the concern on his brother’s face, and turned back to the victim, who had cried herself out, and now just looked exhausted. “Actually, Agent Murdock, I think we’ve got what we need.” He turned to the woman, “Thank you miss, for your help.”

They walked into the foyer, where Dean stopped him and pointed out the window, “What the hell is Scotland Yard doing here?” he growled.

Sam furrowed his brow, “He’s a little young to be Scotland Yard. What’d you tell him?”

“Gave ‘em Bobby’s number, told ‘em to work it out with my DA. But I don’t know how they work. You think he’ll be trouble?”

Sam scoffed, “Yeah, but when’s there ever not?” They waited a few more moments, until the English Inspector drove away, before going out to the Impala.

-o-

“Wait, wha’?” Eggsy spat. “You mean they’re some sorta freelancers?”

“Hunters, Galahad. They go around the country, take care of somma the more interestin’ things about.”

“Bullshit, Merlin. They’re in my way.”

“It’s fine. Leave them be, they don’t know we exist anyway. Get in yer car and drive. Got a new lead,” Merlin replied, sending GPS directions to Eggsy’s glasses.

“Yeah, all righ’,” Eggsy muttered, going back to the car. “Drivin’ on the wrong side of the road. Stupid system.” He started it up and drove off, returning to the hotel on Merlin’s instructions to arm himself fully before heading back out at dusk.

-o-

“Brighton?” Eggsy grumbled. “What the hell is ‘ere anyhow?”

“Murderers,” Merlin said cooly.

“No shit,” Eggsy said, parking the car. “A cemetery? Really?”

“Over a hundred years old, but it’s the house behind it you’ll be wanting to focus on,” Merlin instructed. “That’s where the targets are.”

“Why am I heading out at night to go fuck wit’ some murderers?” Eggsy asked, straightening his suit as he climbed the hill up to the cemetery ignoring the car that drove past. “What is this, some kinda fucked up horror film?”

-o-

Three interviews later, and they confirmed what they needed. They said their goodbyes to the aunt and uncle of the fourth missing teen, Peter, and headed to the motel.

“So I’m thinking that the house behind the cemetery isn’t the nest itself; there’s no way they were throwing house parties all day and night with a dozen vamps setting up shop,” Sam thought aloud.

“Yeah, there’s no way. But it’s definitely where they’re getting their vics. All four kids went to the house then wind up missing a day later? No way it’s not connected.”

“So, you wanna catch dinner first, or should we head that way now?”

Sam’s cell rang before Dean could answer.

“Hey Bobby. Yeah, I’ll put you on speaker,” Sam answered.

Dean shouted out, “Hey, that English asshole call you?”

“Yeah, that’s why I’m calling. I don’t know who the hell this guy is, but he ain’t Scotland Yard.”

“Then who the hell is he?”

“Dunno. But I’ve got a hunter contact at the Yard, says the guy’s in their computer, but he doesn’t work there; he’s thinking they’ve been hacked. Whoever they are, these guys ain’t messing about. Watch your backs, boys.”

Dean chuckled, “Yeah, I’m not too worried about some stuffed shirt.”

“Yeah,” Sam pointed out, “But if he’s sniffing around, he’s gonna end up dead. And if this guy’s got connections, we don’t need that sort of heat.”

“Shit,” Dean griped, “We’re not getting dinner, are we?”

Thirty minutes later, they pulled up to the house, after having shed their monkey suits at a gas station on the way. Dean parked right in front, and they popped the trunk. They each grabbed blades and syringes of dead man’s blood. As the approached the front door, Dean asked, “Should we knock?”

“It’s supposed to be abandoned, can’t imagine squatters are gonna answer, Dean.”

Sam tried the door handle, then the two windows on the porch; all were locked tight.

Dean sighed, pulling out his lock picks.

-o-

"Merlin. It's those two blokes from before. Fuckers," Eggsy swore. "I'm goin' in. Deal with them now."

"You won't. You'll wait and see what they're doin' before you go in guns blazing," Merlin snapped. "We need to know who these two are. Mebbe more of them."

"Fine," Eggsy growled. "But I'm moving in closer. There's a window for me to watch from."

He wriggled out from his spot, slipping through the broken graveyard fence and to a boarded up window. He smirked and tugged the board away, peering inside.

-o-

It took a matter of seconds for Dean to get in, and he tucked the lock picks back in his pocket, and held his bowie machete at the ready. He motioned to Sam that they case the ground floor then move on.

The living room had a variety of chairs that looked as though they’d been pilfered from a trash heap, and there were drops of blood dried onto the hardwood floor.

As he walked into the dining room, only identifiable by a lopsided Norman Rockwell Thanksgiving, a gush of air flew by him, Sam shouted, and a loud thud followed.

“Dean!”

Dean turned, blade out and saw Sam on the ground, underneath a snarling figure.

“Oh no you don’t!” Dean shouted, rushing into the room, blade drawn. Something caught his arm, swiveling him back around; another vampire, baring her sharp teeth at him. As he was pulled back, he reached into his pocket, grabbed the syringe, and plummeted it into her chest as she tightened her hold on his arm.

She gasped, falling backwards, clutching her chest, looking shocked at the syringe and back up to Dean. “Hunters!” she hollered weakly.

Dean turned his head just in time to catch eyes with the vamp tackling Sammy; who had turned to see his partner. And in that moment, Dean watched his head fall sideways, as Sammy sliced through his neck. Dean turned back to the woman, who had collapsed against the wall.

“Where’s the nest?” he growled, holding up the blade to the throat.

“No,” she rasped, “Not my family.”

“We’ll find ‘em either way, sister, I promise you that,” Dean threatened.

She shook her head, and Dean had enough experience to know that their “family” loyalty rivaled his own. He swung, taking her head clean off, and watched as the body fell, blood pulsing out the open arteries.

-o-

Eggsy pulled back, hastily ducking as one of the men inside turned toward the window. "Merlin. Didja see that?" He licked his lips as the image of the shorter agent powerful arms slicing the woman's neck filtered through his mind. He shook his head, disgusted at the thought that _that_ would get him going.

"I did. I'm running facial recognition now," Merlin said angrily. "Fuckin' mad bastards, taking their heads off."

"They're bastards all righ'," Eggsy replied, pulling a gun from one of his holsters, idly missing his umbrella. "Mighta seen me too."

"Well, deal with the problem. But don't kill them," Merlin warned. "I'll be in yer ear the whole time. If you need to knock them out, go on."

"Right," Eggsy said. "I can handle tha'." He stood, and crept around the building, waiting to see if he'd run into anyone.

-o-

“Shit, Sammy, I think we got company. Our own little James Bond stalker, running ‘round the woods in a goddamned three piece suit.”

“We gotta find him, Dean,” Sam warned, already headed out the dining room door.

Dean turned back to the window, and jimmied it open, looking to see that the coast was clear before jumping out. He walked silently around the corner of the house, where Bond was peeking in through another window. From a safe distance, Dean pulled his gun, aimed, and cleared his throat.

“Can we help you, _Inspector_?”

Eggsy whirled with a smile. “Can you? _Agent_? _”_ He gave the man and his gun a quick once over. “Looks like you’re pleased to see me.”

“You wanna tell me why you’re here? 'Cause I know you don’t know what the fuck’s going on.” Dean didn’t lower his gun, “And certainly not dressed like that.”

“I’m dressed like this cause I'm working, and cause I look good doin' it," Eggsy retorted, ignoring Merlin's sudden curse.

"Eggsy. There's a problem. These two are for some reason comin' up deceased. Dean and Samuel Winchester."

Eggsy smirked. "Look, I've spoke wit' your... boss. So let's just work together, and no mind the consequences."

“Yeah, that’s the problem. You can’t even fucking fathom the consequences. Listen, we know you ain’t Scotland Yard, and I can promise you, you are in over your head. Want me to prove it to ya?”

“Sure, prove it,” Eggsy said. “But, I know you ain’t FBI either.” He grinned. “Winchesters, huh? Think if I go around a few places, someone’ll recognize your names? Why don’t you tell me what’s really goin’ on here?”

“We’re dead, buddy. And it’s gonna stay that way. Get in the house, Bond.” Dean hadn’t put down his gun, but he was concerned. How the fuck did this guy know their names? They didn’t have prints on file; how could he have possibly known who they were?

“No, don’t think I will,” Eggsy said, smoothly pulling a gun from his waistband and training it on Sam. The other was pointed at Dean with a grin. “Now, either we work together, or we don’t work at all. An’ I’d ‘ppreciate it if you stopped pointing that thing at me.”

“Yeah, asshole, I don’t see that happening,” Dean snarled, “And you’re the dick who insisted on knowing what the fuck was going on. If you wanna know, get in the goddamned house. Otherwise, fuck off, and when you get your ass eaten, it’s not gonna matter how fucking fancy your suit is, and you’re gonna be wishing you’d gone in the goddamned house.” To emphasize his point, he pulled the bowie machete out, still coated in blood, and pointed to the front door.

"When I get my ass eaten, won't be wearing the fucking suit, will I?" Eggsy said snarkily, ignoring Merlin's voice telling him to knock the two unconscious and go. He smiled, and slipped his guns back into their respective places. "Al'righ'. Guns away. So, wanna tell me what's happenin' 'ere?"

Dean felt the blush down his neck at the innuendo. Bond cut a good figure in that suit, Dean could appreciate that; but to think about getting him out of it? Dean shook the thoughts out of his head as he lowered his own weapon. He kept both the gun and the machete out, but at his sides.

“Follow me,” Dean said, overly gruff to mask his embarrassment, “You won’t believe me unless I show you.” He trained his eyes to the door, avoiding the temptation to get a good look at Bond’s ass.

Eggsy sauntered in, brushing past him with an intentional smirk and walking down the hall until he reached the carnage. "Al'righ'. You two fuckin' killed two people. Why am I not arrestin' you?" Eggsy asked, leaning up against the door frame.

Sam spoke up, “For one, you’re not a cop, for two, you can’t. Trust me, I know my rights.” He walked over, picking up the severed head of the woman and bringing it close, “But I’m guessing you want to know about this.”

He set the head on the table, and Dean leaned in to open the mouth. He pressed on the head’s gums, and a second set of sharp, inhuman teeth slid out. “Vampires, the both of them,” Dean stated, “Only way to kill ‘em is to chop their heads off.”

Eggsy blinked. "Righ' vampires."

"Somethin' I really should tell you," Merlin said quickly in his ear. "There's a bit of a problem in America....well let's just say we've got a division of Kingsman that does exactly what these two do. They're hunters."

"So you two are hunters," Eggsy said, gesturing at them. "And you're after a crowd of vampires, which been killing all these people."

Dean couldn’t hold back his smile, but at least looked to the ground, “Seems you’re a quick study.” He wiped his hand on his pants.

Sam frowned, “No, wait. If you knew we were hunters, this wouldn’t have phased you. You would’ve- How are you getting your information?”

"Lucky guess?" Eggsy said, raising his eyebrows.

"Oh right. Good job, Eggsy," Merlin grumbled. "Now they're gonna know I'm here."

Sam scoffed, “Try again.”

"I'm psychic, an' the answers just come to me." Eggsy grinned, winking. "Tha' power comes with X-Ray vision."

"Eggsy...." Merlin said warningly, watching the brother's faces. "Try not to piss off the trained killers, aye? Though that's all you ever do."

Dean spoke up again, this time looking Bond in the eye, “Listen kid, I don’t have time for this bullshit. We’ve shown you this ain’t your thing, so get the fuck outta dodge, before some vamp uglies up that pretty face of yours.”

"How d'you know this ain't my thing?" Eggsy said, crossing his arms. "An' fer the record, I'm not a kid, guv. Very much a man, with a gun and a job ta do. Don' fuck me around. I don' appreciate it unless I got a bed underneath me." He pointed at the head on the table. "One of those kills my target, I failed my job. And I'm not goin' anywhere. We migh' as well work together."

Dean rubbed his hand over his face. “Fine, whatever, it’s your own damned head.”

Sam nodded, and explained, “All the vics went to a house party thrown here the day before they were killed. We’re thinking this is where they hunt. But from what we can tell, there’s gotta be a nest nearby, with at least a dozen more vamps.”

“And those fuckin’ pea shooters ain’t gonna do a damn thing to ‘em.” Dean gestured to Bond’s waist. Gotta chop their heads off, or you can slow ‘em down with dead man’s blood. But a bullet isn’t gonna do a damn bit of good.”

"Tha's not a problem," Eggsy said with a smirk. "I'll just get my blade."

"You don' have a blade," Merlin said, but the tapping of his fingers indicated he was already preparing one to be waiting for Eggsy at the hotel.

"Where will I meet you?" Eggsy asked, raising his eyebrows. "Assumin' you trust me enough to leave alone, me bein' the scary ass English agent I am."

“We have to clean up here,” Sam explained, ignoring the taunt, “Be back in an hour?”

"There'll be a blade waitin' for ye,'" Merlin muttered.

"Sure. An hour’s just enough time," Eggsy said. "Course, all night's always better." He winked and brushed past Dean again, leaving the house and vaulting back across the broken fence to get to his car.

Dean had a thought, and rushed to the window, yanked it open, and shouted, “Hey Bond!”

Eggsy paused, looking back. "Wha'?" He called, brushing down his suit.

“Bring me back a burger, yeah? I’ll pay you for it later! Something with bacon, I’m fucking starving!”

Eggsy broke out into a grin, and turned away, heading to the car without giving Dean an answer.

Dean turned back to Sammy, “Well, looks like we got some work to do. Shit, I hope Bond brings me a fuckin’ burger. I could eat a damned horse.”


	2. Sexual Torsion

An hour and ten minutes later, Eggsy was back. He strode right in, tossing a greasy bag at Dean. With a smirk at Sam’s put out look, he tipped his head in the direction. “Got a salad in there too. Big one. Don’t like all tha’ greasy shit.” He plopped down in a chair. “So. Where we goin’ next?”

Dean pulled food out of the bag, tossing the salad Sam’s way with a dirty look. He opened his own burger and took a big bite. With his mouth full, he commented, “Awesome. Haven’t eaten since breakfast. How much do we owe you?”

Eggsy snagged the salad from Sam, plucking a cucumber from the top and crunching down. “Some answers,” he said, swallowing. “Names, first of all.”

Sam pouted at the loss, but Dean cut him off before he could say anything, “You already know. Winchester. That’s Sam, I’m Dean. And you?”

“Call me Eggsy. Eggsy Unwin.” Eggsy smiled. “Now, vampires. Tell me more. Tell me where we’re goin’ next. Tell me how many I’ll need to kill before I can go home.”

“Cocky son of a bitch, ain’t ya?” Dean said between bites. Sam coughed obviously, and Dean glared at him. Dean continued, “Seriously, though? Eggsy? Is that- I mean, I thought you English types had names like-” He made a mock serious face and affected an accent, “Charles and William.”

Sam rolled his eyes, “Just ignore him.”

“Not where I’m from,” Eggsy said, with a nod of appreciation to Sam. “An’ I’m cocky, but I got the skills to back it up. So, tell me ‘bout these vamps.”

Sam started, since Dean was still eating. “So, our intel tells us we’re looking at a big nest, they’ve been up to Houghton-Hancock and back, hunting, killing and occasionally turning a few.”

Sam gestured to the spot where the female vampire’s body had been just an hour ago. “The blonde was carrying a fake ID with a local address. Since it’s starting to get dark, we can’t do much until daylight. One part of the lore that is true, they prefer to sleep during the day. Makes it the best time to check it out.”

Dean happily finished his burger, and fished out a few napkins from the bag. Eggsy was watching Sam, so Dean took just a moment to look him over. The suit was perfectly fit, and though Dean didn’t know much about these things, he could tell it’d been at least tailored properly, unlike the cheap suits he and Sam wore. He never realized just how… _muscular_ a guy could look, even under all that cloth. Dude was probably loaded, he thought.

“Righ’, sounds like a fun time. So, anything more we gotta do tonigh’?” Eggsy asked. He turned his head, catching Dean’s eyes as they trailed over his arms, and Eggsy smirked. “I mean, I could find somethin’, I’m sure. But we gotta do any research?”

Dean flushed, and looked away, embarrassed to have been caught looking, and gruffed, “You oughtta do a bit on vamps in general. It’s not like you see in the movies; they can smell you, they can hear your damned heart beating from at least a block away. Fucking strong, too. It’s a bitch you’ve got to get close enough to ‘em to chop their heads off.”

“They fast?” Eggsy asked, unconcerned. “Gotta be somethin’ used to slow them down. You managed to get a needle into one of them earlier. What was in it?”

“Dead man’s blood,” Dean answered, then looked to Sam. “We need more don’t we?”

“Yeah.”

Dean turned to Eggsy, “How you feel about breaking into a morgue tonight?”

“Not the first time,” Eggsy replied, smirking at the memory of ending up in a morgue, hidden inside a broom closet. “Anything special we need to do?” he asked, ignoring Merlin’s muttered warning not to get arrested in his ear.

“Not too much,” Sam answered, “But I’m gonna need to hit up a place with some free wi-fi. I doubt even I could find a signal out here.”

Dean laughed, “Swear to god, if there is internet within fifty miles, Sammy can get in. I can’t seem to get the damn thing on unless I’m right next to the router.”

He looked to Eggsy, and thought aloud, “Maybe we need to get you something… less obvious. You stand out a bit. Although- you know, it might actually be easier with you all dressed up like that. People’ll bend over backwards for a pretty rich Englishman.”

Eggsy smirked as Merlin mumbled something about the wifi and a scan. “I know that. They bend over forwards, too.” He licked his lips pointedly at the look of panic on Dean’s face. “Anyway, if you wan’ me to dress down, I can. Rather not though, this suit gets all the birds. An’ the blokes,” he said with a wink.

Dean looked down, ears burning hot, and ran his hand over the back of head. “Hell, you’re not James Bond, you’re Austin- _fucking_ -Powers. I thought you English types were supposed to be all repressed or some shit.”

Sam looked at Dean’s discomfort and sighed. “Alright, then,” he led the conversation away before the sexual tension between Eggsy and his brother choked him to death. “You keep the suit. You need a ride? We can stop by our motel so I can look up some info on the morgue, then head out?”

"Nah. Got a car," Eggsy said. "If you're willin' I can put it back at the hotel then when we're done, you can drop me. Makes sense to only take one car."

“Yeah, we can follow you back,” Sam agreed, then grinned, “Hey, Dean, why don’t you ride with Eggsy here, and I’ll follow you.”

Dean’s face dropped comically, his eyes wide. “Oh hell no! There is no way I’m letting you drive Baby when I’m awake. Nice try, Sammy.”

Under his breath he muttered, “Bitch.”

Sam laughed, “I heard that, jerk.”

Dean glared at Sam, snapping up his trash with a petulant pout. “Let’s clean up, yeah?”

Thirty minutes later, the three of them were in the car, heading to the morgue. Eggsy was sitting in the back, admiring the purr of the engine as they traveled. “Nice car,” he said. “Thought it was a bit clunky at first, but it’s growin’ on me.”

“Damn straight,” Dean said, “I’ve had to rebuild her a few times; and there is nothing but the best for my Baby. She’s home.” He patted the dash. “Hell, she was practically mine before I was born. If it weren’t for me, we’d be in some Scooby-Doo lookin’ van.”

“I don’ think you helped choose a car before you were born,” Eggsy said. “But if it makes you feel good to think so...” He waved his hand with a smirk.

“Yeah, what you don’t know could fill a book, man,” Dean smiled with the memory of convincing John to buy the Impala.

“Yeah, Dean, we’re not here to regale the new guy with stories he’s not gonna believe until he meets Cas,” Sam dismissed. “Let’s focus. We have a forty minute window between security passings. The bodies are kept in the basement; behind one locked door, which should be easy enough. Eggsy, you keep look out; no one’s really gonna question you looking like that. Dean and I’ll get the blood. Sound good?”

"Yeah," Eggsy said as they pulled into the drive. "Right then. You two have fun. Anythin' moves? Kill it," he said with a wink as they walked in, Sam bending to pick the lock.

Dean deliberately placed himself behind Eggsy, one, to be sure the guy didn’t flake out on them, and two, well, officially there wasn’t a second reason, but if Dean just happened to dwell on those muscular thighs, and how strong they might be, then who was he to object?

Eggsy nodded as Sam stood straight, and pushed the door open. “Nice job, guv. I’ll wait here then while you go get the blood?”

“You gonna be here when we’re done?” Dean asked, skeptically.

“Yeah,” Eggsy said, staring him down. “You’re my way home, remember? I mean, sure I have the keys, but…” He smirked as Dean checked his pockets with a curse and held them up. “Sorry, guv,” he said, tossing them over. “Just can’t help myself.”

“You disappear with my Baby, and I’ll hunt you down and kill you myself, you understand?” Dean snarled.

Sam grabbed his arm, and pushed him through the open door, “Not now, Dean, let’s go.” He turned to Eggsy, “Yeah, he has no sense of humor when it comes to his car. I’d be careful ‘bout that.” And he followed Dean, letting the door shut behind them.

Eggsy shrugged and leaned against the wall, waiting to see if anyone would come by.

Three more doors later, and Sam and Dean were finally in the morgue. Sam opened the refrigerator; if they were lucky, the physician would have drained blood samples, making for easy retrieval.

“Shit,” Sam complained, “Just two vials.”

“We’ll have to do it the hard way,” Dean muttered irritably. He pulled on a pair of latex gloves and grabbed a handful of sterile syringes. “Let’s draw some blood.”

Sam stood nearby, with a sharps box he’d ripped from the wall.

Dean collected thirty four vials off of six bodies of sludgy, thick blood, plus the two from the fridge. “Think three per ought to be enough?” Dean asked, “Cuz I don’t think I’m getting any more.”

“Yeah, should be,” Sam agreed, shutting the sharps box with until it clicked. “Man, Dean, you taking that phlebotomy class was brilliant.”

“After dad snuck us into a morgue to cut necks and drain bodies? Christ, we were wanted for weeks for that shit,” Dean remembered with a frown. “But you were at Stanford then, I doubt you’d remember that.”

“I saw it on the news,” Sam said quietly. “Figured it was hunters, just didn’t know it was you two.” He shook his head. “Forget it. Let’s go, see if he’s still there.”

Dean stripped off his gloves, and shoved them into his pockets; wouldn’t do to leave prints. At least no one seemed to look too carefully at an extra blood draw site on a dead body. He and Sam snuck down the hall; peeking through the last door to see if Eggsy was still there. Dean patted his pockets, where to his relief, his keys jingled.

Eggsy hushed Merlin as the brothers stepped back out. “Get it?” he asked, and when Sam nodded he grinned. “Let’s go then. Can I drive?”

Dean looked to Sam severely, and Sam shook his head, “No, Dean, you can’t kill him.”

Dean glared at Eggsy without a word, and passed by, rushing quickly back to the Impala.

Eggsy winked at Sam, and darted out after Dean, hopping over the short fence and jumping into the passenger seat of the Impala before Dean realized what was going on and locked the doors. “So,” he said, licking his lips. “This is your baby, yeah?” He stroked a thumb over the console, keeping his eyes on Dean. “Treat her right? Take good care of her?”

“Listen, asshole, I know you are foreign or some shit, but you don’t touch a man’s goddamned car. This is my Baby, this is my fucking home, and it’s like you’re pissing in the goddamned fireplace. What the hell is wrong with you!?” Dean’s rage was boiling to the surface, buried just beneath his clenched teeth.

Eggsy raised his hands in surrender. “Look, Dean. All I was wonderin’ was how long it’s been since someone treated you as nice as you treat this car.” He winked. “Since yer takin’ me back to my hotel and all. Figured we could get some... _research_ done together.” He shrugged, smirking at Dean. “But I can get in the backseat again. Probably couldn’t handle this anyway.”

Dean sighed, holding his head in his hand. “Sorry man, like Sammy said, I ain’t got a sense of humor when it comes to Baby.” He looked up and out the window, refusing to make eye contact. “And no one can treat me as well as I treat her. Don’t deserve it anyways. Once you’ve been to hell and back, you pretty much don’t deserve shit, you know?”

Eggsy glanced out the window, seeing Sam walking exceptionally slowly to the car. He leaned in, breath hot over Dean’s skin. “I can’t say if you deserve it or not. But I know you want it,” he whispered, letting his lips brush just over Dean’s ear. “And you should lemme try, luv. Cause I got just what you need.”

The heat of his breath and the suggestion in his words sent sparks down Dean’s spine, and he felt his blood rushing south. He closed his eyes, imagining for a moment what it might be like, to be taken care of, then sighed bitterly.

“Not on a hunt, man, can’t be distracted. And honestly, I’ve never- I mean- not when I’m hunting with a partner. I don’t wanna find out what Sammy’d think of me. You know what I mean, yeah?”

Eggsy raised his eyebrows, leaning back. “Don’t wanna get distracted, sure. But your brother is the one hanging outside like a lil’ lost puppy waitin’ for us ta finish our chat. I don’t think he’d mind.” He shrugged. “Your call, guv. Maybe after the mission, we can revisit this.”

“Yeah,” Dean laughed nervously, “Let’s see what happens with the vamp nest first.” He hesitantly touched the spot where the heat of Eggsy’s breath was dissipating, a finger lingering down the length of his neck before coming up to wipe his face. He saw Sammy hanging back, just as Eggsy had said, and he nodded to him.

Sam slid into the back seat and asked with forced neutrality, “You droppin’ me off, Dean?”

“Just me,” Eggsy said, winking at him. “Been a long day. I’m jetlagged.” Dean started the car up and they pulled out of the lot, the trip back to Eggsy’s hotel silent. When they arrived, Eggsy hopped out and sauntered up to Dean’s open window. “‘Member what I said, guv. Got what you need,” he murmured, then stepped away, hands shoved in his pockets as he went into the hotel.

Dean nodded, but while looking at his lap, not making eye contact. Sam moved himself from the back to the front seat, and Dean could feel his stare, feel Sam trying to catch his eye, and Dean refused to look. “Figures he’d be crashing in a place like this,” he deflected.

“Dean. What are you doing?” Sam asked, giving him a disbelieving look.

“Baking a cake, Sammy, what the hell do you think?” Dean scoffed, “I’m driving to the motel. Nothing we can do tonight, might as well get some rest.”

“You could be doing something tonight,” Sam said, crossing his arms and turning to the window with a smirk. “He likes you.”

“Yeah,” Dean forced out awkwardly, “Guy like that likes everybody. Doesn’t mean it goes both ways.” This was a topic he and Sam had never discussed, and he’d kind of hoped it’d stay that way.

Sam sighed. “Whatever, Dean.” Privately, he didn’t even think Dean would make it until the end of the hunt. “I’m just saying. Doesn’t matter what you do, I don’t care.”

Dean just shook his head. He didn’t want to talk to Sam about it. He didn’t want to talk about it at all. It was times like this, though, that he missed hunting alone.

Sam rolled his eyes, but dropped the subject. And when they got to the motel and Dean just threw himself on the bed in a huff, beer in hand, Sam still said nothing, just stripping off his jeans and jackets and burrowing into the stiff, scratchy sheets of his own bed.


	3. Shock and Awe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: LEO stands for Law Enforcement Officer

Eggsy smirked as the Impala pulled up and went over, getting in the back seat. “Ready for the big day?” he asked with a yawn. “How far away is this place?”

“‘Bout twenty minutes,” Sam answered, “If all goes well, it’s gonna get bloody. You okay with that?”

Eggsy glanced down at his suit. “Sure. Gotta good tailor, cleans too.”

“Must be nice,” Dean muttered. He’d thrown out more clothes than he knew what to do with; and only ever picked up something new at thrift stores. What was the point when they all got covered with blood anyways?

They parked about a quarter mile from the house, and Sam went through the trunk, passing out weapons.

Eggsy turned down a gun, but accepted a sharp machete. “Nice,” he muttered, testing the blade with his thumb. “I know some people who’d kill for this.”

Dean laughed,”Tell me about it. But lot of this is specialized; wouldn’t do your average joe a bit of good.” Dean pointed to the jug of holy water, and a small knife with stylized handle, “Can’t even begin to explain how useful those can be.”

“You could,” Eggsy said. “I wouldn’t mind learnin’ a few new techniques.”

Dean snorted, “Yeah, if you didn’t believe the bit about the Impala, I doubt you’re ready for that.”

“Like this,” Sam said, pulling out three small packs to latch around their legs, “We’ve each got ten vials of dead man’s blood. If you come across a sleeping vamp, just take the head off. The vials are just in case they wake up, because then we’ll be fucked.”

Eggsy gave a funny half smile. “Sounds like a party,” he said, attaching the pack. “All right. Ready?” At the brothers' nods, they headed forward, coming up upon what looked like a seemingly normal house, if a bit worse for the wear.

Stepping around a rusted oven, Eggsy glanced ahead. “Merlin?” he whispered. “Can you get a heat fix on the house?”

“Nothin’ Galahad,” Merlin rumbled. “I’ve got blueprints, but tha’s all. Yer goin in blind. And while I have ye, what do you think yer doin’ with the--”

Eggsy cut him off with a tap, focusing on Sam and Dean at his sides and the house in front. “Right, let’s go then. Separatin’ or sticking together?”

“Yeah, let’s stick together,” Dean said, “I’m keepin’ an eye on you til I know you can handle yourself.”

Sammy jimmied the lock, and got the door open with ease. He opened it slowly, making sure it didn’t creak. He cased the hallway, then motioned for Eggsy and Dean to follow.

Eggsy crept along silently, following Dean and Sam’s lead. He licked his lips as they came to an open door way, the room past it nearly empty and far too silent for his liking. He glanced around and then looked up. “Move!” he shouted, shoving Dean out of the way as the vampire dropped from where she had braced herself between the wall and a shelving unit. He drew the machete, and sliced clean through her neck before she could advance. “Thought you said they were sleeping?” he hissed, seeing more appear at the doorways, blocking them in. “Fuckin’ ‘ell.”

“Shit.” Dean growled, digging out a syringe. “It’s party time, boys!” He shoved a syringe into the neck of the closest vamp, while swinging his machete to the next; Sam delivering blows in a nearly opposite fashion. They both shoved the weakened vamps back out of the hallway, focusing disabling as many as possible. Dean swung to slice the neck of a vamp creeping up on Eggsy, only to see the head fall off right before he made contact.

Eggsy moved fluidly, and Dean’s jaw dropped for a moment watching him take out vamp after vamp, twice as fast as what he could do. “Motherfucker,” he uttered, and a vicious grip on his arm brought him back to the present. He swung, making contact with another monster, and they came, one after another, pouring into the hall.

“I think Bobby miscounted!” Sam hollered, as the spray of blood from another vamp soaked his right leg.

“Merlin!” Eggsy hissed, ducking under an outstretched arm and coming back up to slice through the vampire’s neck. “You wouldn’t happen to have any advice, ‘ere would ya?”

“I cannae help,” Merlin snapped, furiously typing. “No cameras, no electronics.”

“Fuck,” Eggsy growled. He pushed himself into a corner, and dropped to a knee, pulling out his gun. “Righ’, no more games.” He grabbed the vial of dead man’s blood and cracked it in half, pouring it into his hand. He shoved his thumb into the barrel of the gun, coating the walls. “I need a vacation,” he muttered and stood, shooting into the gathering vampires. He smirked at the first that went down, the now blood covered bullet doing its job. The others followed just as quickly, blood leeching in and paralyzing the creatures. He whistled and waded back in, machete swinging.

“Jesus, I told you a gun wouldn’t do shit!” Dean hollered, then just as soon as he saw one after another vamp trip and fall, swiveled his head to Eggsy, “What the hell’d you do?” He didn’t wait for an answer, just shouted, “Keep it up!”

Dean circled around, Sam dashing out one door and back in through another, and suddenly, they’d surrounded the monsters left, a half dozen, all stumbling weakly, with obvious signs of dead man’s blood poisoning shooting through their veins. With a few final well placed swings, the last body was pulsing blood onto the floor. Dean was soaked, drenched in blood, heaving. He looked to Sam, then to Eggsy. “Fuck, guess you can handle yourself,” he admitted.

"More than jus' a pretty face," Eggsy smirked. "An' looks like I took care of that problem you had 'bout getting close enough to use the blood. Yer fuckin' welcome, guv." He tossed the gun to Dean. "The barrel. Coated it with blood, bullets get the blood on 'em." He raised a single eyebrow, catching Dean's gaze. "Mission complete, yeah? What's my prize?"

Dean just laughed, “Jesus, you’ve got a one track mind. How ‘bout a fucking shower? And we’ve gotta burn these bodies before we go.”

Sam looked down at himself, “Yeah, I’ll bet they’ve at least got some running water here; I’ll check upstairs.” He headed to the stairs, machete still in hand.

“I’ll check this floor,” Dean said. “Bet it’s that one there,” he pointed to the end of the hall, “Only one fucking vamps didn’t pour out of.”

He walked stiffly to the bathroom, the feeling of blood settling into his clothes finally registering with his brain, and making him uncomfortable

Eggsy did a quick sweep of the other rooms, then stepped quietly into the bathroom, catching Dean's eye in the mirror. "You know, I think I gotta say thanks," he said, quietly, stepping up to the sink and grabbing a musty towel to scrub the blood from his hands. "Made my job a load fuckin' easier."

“Yeah, likewise,” Dean muttered, scrubbing at the blood on his arms, then peeling the bloody shirt off. He bent over to turn the water on the shower on. “Shit, no hot water. Well, this shower’s gonna suck.”

He started to tuck his thumb into his boxers, then paused, looking to Eggsy, and climbed into the shower, pulling his boxers off behind the curtain. He stepped into the water and shivered, “Fuck!” he stuttered through shaking teeth.

"Cold?" Eggsy asked. "They had us do tha' in training. I think it was supposed to build character or sommat. All it did was freeze your bollocks off and make your cock hide for the next forty hours." He laughed.

“Yeah, you remember that when I get out,” Dean stammered, then pulled the curtain aside halfway, covering his lower half, “Can- uh- can you make sure I ain’t got no blood down my back?”

"Dunno. Might have to get in to see," Eggsy said, raising an eyebrow. "Unless you wanna just turn around."

Dean turned around, trying to keep his ass covered in the process. Despite the cold, his cheeks burned, but if he would be damned it he was walking around with vamp blood dried onto skin.

Eggsy licked his lips at the back muscles on display, Dean’s skin flushed red despite the cold. “Looks like you got a trail, just here. Lemme.” He reached out and dragged his thumb along Dean’s spine, ending just above the curve of his arse where it was hidden by the shower curtain, rubbing away the dried blood. “There,” he said, laying his palm on Dean’s lower back for just a moment before stepping away. “All clean. ‘Cept for my thoughts.”

Dean felt tendrils of warmth spread from where Eggsy’s touch had swept down the base of his spine, and nearly jumped when he placed his whole palm just above his arse. He’d been holding out, but Dean didn’t think he could much longer. He’d forgotten just how fantastic it could be, the way men were, lean, strong, and he found himself desperate for Eggsy to touch him again.

“Thanks,” he muttered, but it came out far breathier than he’d intended.

“My pleasure,” Eggsy said. “And ya know. My offer still stands.”

“It’s a bit cold for that right now, yeah?” Dean deflected.

“Not in my hotel room,” Eggsy replied. “You know. Since yer done with the hunt an’ all. I don’t fly out till tomorrow.”

“Yeah, let us take care the bodies, and we’ll see,” Dean replied, with a smirk, still not ready to commit, but interested enough to flirt. As he went to leave the cold shower, he remembered what he was missing. “Shit! My change of clothes is in the trunk.”

“Keys an’ I can get it for you,” Eggsy said. “Assumin’ you trust me with Baby. Though I’d like the view.”

Dean deliberated, but in the end there was no choice. He didn’t trust anyone with Baby. “Yeah, no, I’ll get ‘em myself.” With one hand over his cock, Dean pulled the curtain aside, and rifled through his pants pockets to find the keys. He nodded towards the shower, “Your turn,” and shuffled out of the room.

Eggsy rolled his eyes and stripped, watching Dean as he walked away with a smirk. He jumped in for a quick shower, before dressing again. His jacket had caught most of the blood, and he left it off, figuring trousers and a shirt would have to do. “Ready?” he asked, stepping out and seeing Sam examining a book laying on the ground.

Dean came up behind Sam, in a fresh change of jeans and a few shirts for warmth. “Ready,” he declared. “Whaddya think? Burn the bodies on a pile out back? Or it is just easier to torch the place to the ground?”

“Gas explosion?” Eggsy said, holding up a lighter with a grin. “I can make tha’ happen.”

Sam spoke up, “Yeah, but we’d better have a plan in place. The local LEOs aren’t gonna just accept gas explosion, you know?”

“I can make tha’ happen,” Eggsy repeated, Merlin muttering a confirmation in his ear. “Simple pipe leak, someone left the stove on….” He shrugged. “Trust me.”

Dean and Sam shared a look, and Dean spoke up, “Yeah, you’re gonna have to tell me how you’re doing that. You’ve got some sort of inside information; I wanna make sure it’s not gonna bite me in the ass once you leave.”

“Can’t tell you,” Eggsy said. “As much as I’d love ta.” He smiled. “It’s not my choice, guv.”

“Yeah, well let me just give you a heads up. Sammy here’s died three times, I’ve died four-”

Sam cut him off bitterly, “No, I got the pleasure of watching you die 107 different times, Dean. All disgustingly creative, too.”

Dean pointed to Sam, but kept eye contact with Eggsy, “Exactly. You fuck us over, and I guarantee we’ll come back, and be gunning for your ass, you got that?”

“I won’t fuck you over,” Eggsy said. ”Less you want me too.” He grinned then shook his head. “Swear on my ma. Not gonna cause you trouble.”

Sam relented, “Well, then, let’s set off a gas explosion.”

“Right then.”

-o-

An hour later the flames were licking at the remains of the house and the three were driving away as fire engines rushed past.

"So," Eggsy said. "Dropping me at my hotel, yeah?"

“Yeah, sounds like a plan,” Dean responded, ignoring both Sam and Eggsy trying to catch his eye. “I think I need to find a good slice of pie, myself.”

Eggsy shrugged. “Sounds good, but I’d rather go back and get outta these clothes. Suits,” he muttered, straightening his tie.

Dean drove back to Eggsy’s hotel, half wishing Sam wasn’t here, and that he could follow Eggsy in; hotel like this; he bet it had a great bed. Maybe even a Jacuzzi tub. But he didn’t have a good reason to stay, any excuse he could think of was way too obvious. Which worked when it was women, but he’d learned early on that no one wanted to know when he was going off with a guy instead.

When they pulled up to the hotel, Eggsy slipped out. He stopped and sent a beckoning look toward Dean, and when the other man didn’t look, he sighed and stepped up to the window once more. Sam was pointedly looking the opposite way and Eggsy leaned in. “Listen. If you two need somethin’, I’m room 112. Ya know, just in case you run into any more vamps.” He set a hand on Dean’s shoulder, thumb ghosting over his skin, right behind his ear. “Or anythin’ else.” He stepped away and smiled. “Been nice knowin’ ye’s.”

Dean ignored the way goosebumps rose over his skin at the touch. Ignored how badly he wanted to lean into the warmth of Eggsy hand, and gave an awkward smile. “You too buddy, you need anything, let us know.”

“I already have,” Eggsy said, and turned, entering the hotel.

“Dean,” Sam said, giving him a pointed look as the car started up again. “Really.”

“Yeah, really, I could go for some pie,” Dean snarked back, watching Eggsy as he walked up the stairs; without his jacket, the cut of his trousers was even more alluring. Something for him to dwell on later, in the warmth of the motel’s shower.

Sam sighed and rolled his eyes, laying his head on the window. “Whatever. Let’s go eat.”

They found a Big Boy open late, and Dean pulled in. He looked to Sam, “You hungry? Or am I just running in?”

“We can go in,” Sam said, opening his door and unfolding himself from his seat. “They have a salad bar.” They walked in and sat down, Dean immediately going for a slice of apple pie. Sam shook his head and went over to the salad bar, filling his plate. “So. Eggsy,” Sam said, staring Dean down.

“What about him?”

“Dean, come on. I’m not stupid. He likes you.”

“Who wouldn’t?” Dean tried to joke, “I’m a catch.”

“And you’re not going to go back there tonight?” Sam said, not laughing. “What are you so afraid of, dude? He’s just a normal guy.”

“Yeah, exactly, Sammy,” Dean pointed his fork at him, “He’s a guy. Why’re you trying so badly to get me out of the motel tonight anyways? You got your own date?”

“No, but you could,” Sam replied, popping a cucumber into his mouth with a snarky crunch. “Besides, not like I care who you do it with. Up to you.”

“Yeah, right. Last thing I need is to add my own brother to list of people who won’t share a room with me cuz they think I’m gonna ‘go gay’ on ‘em,” Dean spat out, then grimaced. That was more than he’d meant to share. Sammy wasn’t ever supposed to know ‘bout the problems he’d had after Sam’d left for Stanford.

“I’m not dad, and I’m not anyone else who’d be stupid enough to think that,” Sam said quietly. “Besides. Who gives a fuck? You want him, go get him. He’d be more than willing to open his door for you.” He shook his head and set down his fork. “You’re my brother. I just want you happy, dude.”

Dean barked out a harsh laugh, “Since when do I get to be happy?” He placed his face into his hands, then ran them through his hair, “I dunno, Sammy. You say that now, but how’re you gonna treat me tomorrow? I mean, you know how many times some hunter says he don’t care, but the next day, he sits soaking in fucking blood and guts ‘cause he thinks I’ll fucking jump ‘im if he changes in front of me?”

“Okay, first of all, you’re my brother. You’ve had enough time to jump my ass in the last thirty fucking years, you’re not gonna do it now. Second, I don’t give a shit. Back at Stanford, before Jess, there was Jack. Only two weeks, but it happened. So yeah,” Sam said, crossing his arms and leaning back. “Don’t give a shit. Get over yourself, cause I really, really don’t care. There is a seriously hot dude who has been checking you out almost as much as you’ve been checking him out. And he knows how to handle a gun, and he knows you’re a hunter. He’s a perfect one night stand if nothing else.”

Dean looked up, skeptical but hopeful, “Seriously? Jack? Why’d you never say anything?”

"Because it wasn't a big deal," Sam replied. "And because any time anything turns just a little gay, you panic and change the subject."

“You say it wasn’t a big deal, but you didn’t have to deal with Dad.” Dean jammed a hunk of pie in his mouth. He swallowed after a moment. “You really don’t care?”

"Not at all," Sam said. "Go get laid. Or don't. Either way, you're gonna drop me off the motel and stay out all night. Got it?"

Dean gave a soft smile, “Yeah, okay. I got it. One more piece of pie, though.”

-o-

Dean’s heart was pounding as he dropped Sam off at the motel. For Sammy to know, to really know what he was going to do; he worried that despite Sam’s reassurance, he’d look at him different in the morning. But instead he just said, “This stays between us, yeah, Sammy?”

"Yes, Dean." Sam smiled. "Go. Don't make him wait."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of the teen rated story!
> 
> If you were hoping to see exactly what happens next, we'll be posting that in the next few days as the second fic in the series (and that will be considerably more explicit).

**Author's Note:**

> And here is a [SFW gif set](http://phipiohsum475.tumblr.com/post/127863919228/hey-bond-were-dead-buddy-and-its-gonna-stay) for your enjoyment!
> 
> Visit us on Tumblr at [Hums-Happily](http://hums-happily.tumblr.com) and [PhiPiOhSum475](http://phipiohsum475.tumblr.com/).  
> We've now started a new blog for this ship at [DeanAndEggsy](http://deanandeggsy.tumblr.com).


End file.
